

埃默里大學(xué)個人陳述是構(gòu)成整個申請材料的關(guān)鍵組成部分,也影響著最終錄取結(jié)果的好壞!下面托普仕留學(xué)Hanna老師給您分享一篇埃默里大學(xué)個人陳述范文,幫您破譯如何寫好一篇文章!
埃默里大學(xué)個人陳述范文示范:內(nèi)附招生官優(yōu)勢解讀,助您破譯好文章寫作的密碼!
隨著埃默里大學(xué)申請材料遞交數(shù)量比去年增加19%,2021年埃默里大學(xué)的錄取人員對申請者進(jìn)行了歷史以來最嚴(yán)格的評估,最終出色的個人陳述描述成為角逐最后誰被錄取的關(guān)鍵影響因素。
下面是埃默里大學(xué)展示出來的被錄取學(xué)生的部分個人陳述范文,它將顯示出:一篇好的個人陳述可能涉及多個主題,但如何機(jī)智的突出學(xué)生的性格,好奇心和話語權(quán),這是學(xué)生需要學(xué)習(xí)的地方。
備注:末尾還附有招生人員對這篇個陳述優(yōu)勢的具體解讀,讓您掌握譜寫更好文章和故事的秘訣!
所要概述的問題:
描述一個你覺得很吸引人的話題、想法或概念,它會讓你忘記所有的時間。并且闡述為什么它會迷住你?當(dāng)你想學(xué)習(xí)更多的東西時,你會向誰求助?
“Describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose all track of time. Why does it captivate you? What or who do you turn to when you want to learn more?”
所給出的個人陳述回答范文:
“I tap my red pen inattentively against the draft sitting before me. After some silent musing, I finally drag a line of ink through a phrase and reword it in small, loopy letters above. As a final thought, I circle the space between two words. My writer forgot the Oxford comma. Again.
The Oxford comma is the comma used after the penultimate item in a list. I learned about this majestic piece of punctuation at an early age and wondered how anyone could advocate against it. How could anything that adds so much clarity, while requiring so little effort, be controversial? When I joined my school’s newspaper in sophomore year and learned that AP style does not use the comma, I was shocked. Therefore, when I became Managing Editor my senior year, my first initiative was reinstating it.
Others might find this to be a trivial concern, but you know what they say about the devil: he lives in the details. It is part of my personal philosophy that details are the most essential part of any plan or project; they are what separates the bad from the good, and the good from the great. Details are vital to my work as a copy editor. Occasionally, writers groan when they hear that I will be the one editing their story, but that’s how you know you’re doing a good job.
An effective copy editor will do more than correct punctuation: they’ll detect structural problems and predict questions that readers will ask so the writer can answer them. Writers may not love having to make so many changes, but they finish the news cycle with a product they are proud of.
My attention to details, like that elusive comma, does more than make me a good worker: it makes me a good communicator. I listen carefully to people, to details, and I think they matter. I like to share my own opinions through writing and photography, but more than that, I like to share the stories of others. This past summer, I had the opportunity to meet a number of community workers and write about them for the regional newspaper. I got to meet and tell the stories of a couple who owned one of the last free community pools and taught kids to swim without taking out a salary, and a woman in her twenty-second year of running a volunteer event which grants underprivileged children access to new clothes and school supplies. Being able to give these local heroes the spotlight they deserved was more rewarding than I could have ever expected.
What makes me unique is that I don’t just notice details, I care about them. I think clarity of communication is the most vital and most neglected aspect of a functional society. That is why I believe journalism and communication are important. You can’t move someone who is stuck in their ways by spouting facts and figures at them. You convince people by telling stories, stories that appeal to our shared humanity.
Reporting is community building, and we definitely need more of that in this day and age. By listening to details and sharing observations, I can sometimes help two people who were not able to find common ground see past their differences. I believe this is an important part of being on the newspaper staff and even of being a good friend. And that is why I care about communication, and by extension, the Oxford comma”
埃默里大學(xué)招生人員對上述個人陳述反饋及評價:優(yōu)勢體現(xiàn)在哪里?
“作為入學(xué)顧問,我們有時喜歡將申請視為一個故事,申請書的每個部分,包括筆錄、論文和推薦信,因為在一起,所以提供了一個深入的例子,說明每個學(xué)生是誰,以及什么因素會激發(fā)他們的個人和學(xué)業(yè)上的學(xué)習(xí)。
通過該學(xué)生的申請,很明顯新聞和講故事是一種激情。他們能夠利用牛津大學(xué)爭議之類的平凡事物來體現(xiàn)自己的優(yōu)勢,并闡述兩種有意義的經(jīng)歷-作為學(xué)校報紙的常務(wù)編輯和當(dāng)?shù)貓蠹埖膶?shí)習(xí)生。他們不僅像列出的簡歷那樣簡單地列出自己的成就,也會講一個簡單的故事來解釋自己的觀點(diǎn)。他們積極運(yùn)用平常小事無縫地編織敘述,從而使學(xué)生的興趣得以一一體現(xiàn)。
這篇文章有助于我們作為招生委員會更好地了解申請人的整體情況,所以要是沒有這篇文章,這個學(xué)生的故事將是不完整的?!?/p>
以上是關(guān)于埃默里大學(xué)個人陳述范文的完整分享,要想獲取更多關(guān)于美國留學(xué)資訊,歡迎您在線咨詢托普仕留學(xué),托普仕留學(xué)專注美國top30高端留學(xué)13年,積攢多年成功申請經(jīng)驗,為諸多學(xué)子提供就讀藤校機(jī)會!